Okay, show of hands: how many of you have already broken your New Year’s Resolutions?
Were your 2023 goals to quit smoking, to eat healthier, to make more time for your kids or your aging parents or your own social life? Did you hope this was the year you’d finally quit that unhealthy relationship or look for a better job or start saving money? Did you give yourself all the good reasons for change – the statistics and values and reminders – and still give up after just a couple weeks?
Well, don’t feel too bad about quitting. Change is a LOT harder than any of us realized.
If you were told tomorrow that your life depended on making a big change, do you know how many would embrace that change? Ten percent. Yep, only one in ten people would actually get rid of the unhealthy habits threatening their life. Even the risk of severe health crises isn’t enough to get people to make sweeping changes to their lives. This debunks the idea that crisis is a powerful motivator for change.
So, you think – change starts small. Also wrong! Those who try to change their dietary habits in baby steps, for instance, fail as often as those who make the big modifications.
But don’t throw your hands in the air. Change can happen, and it’s not a matter of willpower. It’s a matter of emotion.
Joy, it turns out, is way more powerful a motivator than fear. In fact, it is through emotion that we can actually make the big sweeping changes that are necessary.
What’s the secret sauce? It’s community. Change is a matter of emotion connected to accountability.
Let’s look back at those 2023 resolutions. Rather than trying to trick yourself into change by focusing on the statistical information, instead shift into the emotional perspective.
“I want to be healthier so that I can enjoy activities with friends and reconnect with those who make me feel alive.”
“I want to pursue a new career because I really want to make a difference, and to feel fulfilled with how I spend my days.”
“I’m going to save $100 a week for the next quarter so I can book that cruise with my mom. As she gets older, I want to share memories and new experiences that I’ll be talking about forever.”
Once you have a WHY that’s more joyful and less fearful, then you have to create accountability. Tribes exist to support one another and to offer strength when we feel powerless on our own. We need to belong to something bigger than ourselves! We need to have a powerful, heart-felt why in everything we do.
If your 2023 goals included making it to yoga no less than once a week, enlist a buddy. Need one? Your instructor and community here at Sōl Yoga Collective are here for you. After all, you are our emotional connection to what we do and why we do it. And you never know when you might be the change that someone else needs at that moment. See you in the practice room.